Speaking of donkeys...

Alright. So, we have alot to write. Jasmine and I are going to write this one together because it is going to be really long and we are lazy a**es. She also wants to point out that she is proofreading this. So I really hope she misses some. On the way to the Grand Canyon we stopped in Flagstaff for dinner. There was a really annoying guy with a guitar in the cafe we ate at, playing Staind songs. You can imagine how ecstatic we were and our waitress forgot the green chiles and the tomatoes for our burgers. For some reason Jasmine thinks that is important to note. It was okay. The town was pretty hippiefied and we were ready to bootscoot. We drove to Williams because we were told that it was the closest place to stay before the Grand Canyon. We ended up paying 100 friggin dollars to some freaky-deaky(?) a**holes that packed up the Cont breakfast early so we didn't get our share of fattening pastries and OJ. Melis got into a fight with the owner and I (Jon) got to witness it and help a little. It was awesome. Needless to say we didn't win the argument and ended up leaving there with a bad taste in our mouths (or rather no taste because we didn't get to eat our cont. bfast!!!!). Made the trip to the Grand Canyon and well it was pretty much grand! Quite breathtaking and everything you would expect from a big, giant hole in the ground. It was hot and we hiked into it. Much to the dismay of Jasmine because she's a fatty, who doesn't like to exercise, but she was glad she did in the end. After the hot trek into the core of the earth, we decided to eat food. It was rainy, and we wanted to find something cheap, which was impossible. I mean impossible. If you ever go there, pack a sack lunch, for god’s sake, or get some KFC, like the family that saw Jasmine fall out of the car, in the pebbles and hurt herself and she still has a bruise, and it hurts and there’s a sunburn on top of it now. More on that later. Okay, so we ended up eating some bunk-a** pizza from Spaghetti Western which was overpriced and we had to eat it outside and it tasted like frozen pizza. Then we left that hole for what we thought to be much grander places: Las Vegas. Oh yeah, we were supposed to camp in the GC, but there was a forecast for T-storms and well, camping in the rain sucks. When we were there it was actually really nice outside but before we left it started storming, so we think we made the right decision. Back to Vegas. We drove on the Hoover Dam towards Vegas and it was big too. We got to Vegas at night and it was bright. Super bright. Blow-your-freaking-eyes-out-until-they-catch-on-fire-and-roll-down-the-highway-and-cause-an-accident bright. Yeah, that bright. So then we wanted to do the Vegas experience so we stayed in the Tropicana for what we thought was only going to be one night in a hotel, because we had a person lined up from couchsurfing who was going to host us the next night. We had verified everything on the phone that day and she said to call her around 4pm the next day. Whoopeee. Tropicana was cool and we played some slots and naturally Melis won $550 on the first one she played. I won a pocket watch and Jaz won some gaudy Vegas jewels (which you see in the picture below). We had some Margaritas and played some nickel slots. Jaz and I both came out ahead, but not as much as Melis. We fell the f*** asleep. Woke up with great aspirations about the upcoming day, mainly because we were going to finally get to swim. We laid out long enough to get sun burnt at the sweet-a** pool. I tried to play a dance video game and it stole my dollar. The lame-a** attendant told me I had to walk all the way to the front of the casino to get it back. That was a very long walk. When I got there the lady happily gave me my TOKENS back. I walked away annoyed because I was hoping to get the dollar back. I then turned around and asked if I could just get the dollar back. She happily told me that the games are “play at your own risk.” I accepted her deal and then asked if they were going to put any sign up to warn people to stop playing it. She then happily told me that they would. I then informed her that I never told her which game. She then seemed slightly annoyed and asked which one it was. I told her and she wrote it on a post-it note. Something tells me that was thrown in the garbage the second I was out of sight. ARG. Anywayz. I won two free tickets to Xtreme Magic with Dirk Arthur. Even though it was free, I knew I would not be able to sit through it, so I gave them to the girls. They never went. We walked the strip in the sweltering heat and caught on fire and SDR (stop, drop, and rolled for all of you who aren’t in the know). It was terrible. We walked a ridiculous distance to the Bellagio hotel for the buffet because Anna from Denton had told us it was great. Well, I’m sure it was, but it was also $27 each!!!!!! Then we did something that will forever stay in Vegas. Sorry guys and dolls. Okay. Then we called Crystal, our couchsurfing host, to no avail. Then we drove a lot looking for things to do and wi-fi and calling Crystal throughout the day. By 10 we decided she had truly screwed us over. THANKS CRYSTAL! Go eat some dirt. With rotten eggs. So instead of booking another night at Tropicana we had to find a new hotel soon. So after searching forever for wi-fi we found another deal at the Sahara. It was too late to get the deal but we were desperate and we booked a room anyway. It was fine, we slept, woke up, and checked out. That was awesome to not even spend 12 hours at the hotel and have to leave. But, we are used to that by now. We still didn’t have definite plans for our next stop, LA, so we needed to find wi-fi to figure that out. We’ve decided people in the west are pretty d*** unreliable, and are now hoping for someone to prove us wrong. We ended up calling Melissa’s mom’s best friend, Moira, who lives in Mission Viejo, CA which is apparently an hour or so away from LA. She said we could stay with her for 2 nights. Before leaving Loser Vegas, we had to eat. We did. Where? That stays in Vegas. You know what else stays in Vegas? Fat a**es and their fat a** money that they work hard at McD’s to make. Everyone just thinks they are going to strike it rich on those quarter slots, but they soon find out that they have very little money left to gamble after eating at all the fancy shmancy buffets. Yeah, everyone’s gluttonous and decadent. City of greed. I (this is Jasmine now) was glad to get the s*** out of that place. So yeah, we headed off to Cali. We went through the Mojave Desert. S*** was hot. (“and neato” –Jon) As we were entering Cal-i-for-ni-a, the song “California” by Phantom Planet started playing. Jonny says he almost puked, but he didn’t seem like he was, so whatever. We have decided the ipod is a mindreader. There wasn’t even a sign that said “welcome to California”. What a gyp. So we’re driving along and we saw a sign that said “Calico ghost town, exit so and so.” WTF!! We totally have to go there. I was psyched. We pulled up and it was totally deserted. Turns out it was just closed, but we went up the stairs to the town on the hill anyways. Ends up, it was a silver mining town in 1881 til 1896. It was rehabbed in 1951 by some dude. We took an hour walking around the place. They have this building called the Mystery Shack or the Krazee House. Look it up on google. I’ve read about it before, and it’s pretty interesting. We didn’t get to go in though, since it was closed for the day, unfortunately! We also didn’t get to go to the cemetery, and I’m still pretty upset about that. Crying in my sleep, for reals. So then we drove the rest of the way to our destination. Moira and family welcomed us warmly and we pretty much immediately went to bed. The next day, we woke up to go to the beach. The closest ones to here are Huntington and Laguna Beaches. We opted for Laguna because it was the closest and also because it has a totally tubular and awesome show about it on the ol’ MTV about hip young rich kids who live there and are seriously cute and we care about their lives soooo much. Unfortunately we didn’t get to see any of their totally awesome lives in person. B******. We sunbathed and got sand in our hair and nether-regions, and Jonny jumped in waves all day while Melis and I sat around going, “what an idiot.” It was great. And don’t worry, we used lots of sunscreen. We had enough of that sandskrit, so we took the free trammy back to our parking spot (which cost 5 buckies) and went back to Moira’s to eat a delicious, home-cooked meal, but not before we got stuck in traffic for the lifetime of a lizard because a traffic light was broken and people in cali don’t know how a 4 way stop works. We made it back just at 6pm. Dipped in the amazing pool they have here and filled our tummies with pasta and goodness. Now we are doing laundry and typing this long and absurd journal entry for your enjoyment and/or displeasure. You ungrateful bastardos. Tomorrow we are supposed to be meeting up with yet another lovely couchsurfer named Scott. He called us yesterday to say he could accommodate our sleeping on his floor. He is a busy man, so he probably can’t show us around, but that’s okay because we have Jill and Ivory from Myspace lined up for hangtime and interviews. Scott sounds pretty sweet on the phone though, and he’s got good references. The guy that started CS, Casey, was Scott’s first surfed couch. Scott also said he guarantees not to screw us over like Crystal and Dan did. So we’re pretty set. Personally, I’m already a little intimidated by LA, so we’ll see how that goes. I’m hoping for a Vince Vaughn sighting myself. Wish me luck. Jonny also wants you to wish him and Melissa luck, but I dunno what the hell for, because Vince and I are the ones who need the cosmic stars to align in order for us to meet and get married. (sorry for Jon, but I guess he can have Jennifer Aniston in my place, even though he says he doesn’t want her, but I’m sure he wouldn’t kick her out of bed).
Goodnight you knights of Windsor and you maidens of loserville, population you.

-Jaz and Jon

Krazee Houses and Peacocks

We've been stuck in internet-less situations for quite a few days now. And while we have it right this second, we're going to go to the beach instead of hanging out online. Look for an incredibly long entry tonight, though, which we will write while we do laundry and plan out California.

"Is he stoned? I don't know, but his underwear might be."

We woke up very early to go to the local coffee shop to interview some locals about myspace. Got up at 7am to get ready in time. Got there at 8am and found out that the owners were on vacation. Errm. We got a hold of the motel worker and ended up just interviewing her and her friends in the motel lobby. It was some good stuff and since they were younger, it was nice to get a new perspective. We weren’t really having any luck finding anyone to stay with and we were getting antsy. TRC was quirky and cool, but we had already spent a night there and were ready to find our next stop. The Dan guy from Albuquerque was supposed to call us early in the morning, but I certainly wasn’t surprised when he didn’t. He did end up calling later in the day, but it sounded like it was only to tell Melissa that he couldn’t hang out. Ate some more Mexican food. Green chile kicks a**. Melissa stole the pen from the very nice waitress at the restaurant. Don’t believe a word she says in her journal, because she stole it on purpose. We didn’t know where we were going to stay for the night so Jasmine put out an SOS on couchsurfing for anyone that would take us in Albuquerque or Santa Fe. We decided to just start driving toward Santa Fe. Right when we were just leaving TRC, we got a phone call from one of the people we sent the message to. According to their profile they were a couple in their 60s who were anthropology professors. YEAH! So we were very eager to get there ASAP. Everything out here is flat and tan. It’s spectacular to see for miles and miles into the distance, often times the only thing hindering your view being a giant mountain. It seems as though every horizon we go over reveals another new and beautiful sight. All of the houses are adobe which is really cool and nice to see. Arrived in Santa Fe and it was very cool and artsy. Found the couples’ house and promptly met Charles. He was an older fellow with a great silver ponytail and warm demeanor. He showed us around the house which was nothing short of awesome. Their property was encased with a red wall and had great bright blue doors. Inside was what seemed like a perfect little paradise. Wild plants and art flooded the courtyard which led to our own personal building to stay in. It was ridiculous. The more we learned the better it got. Jenny, the better half, was gone to get us some bread and butter. All I could do was laugh. The little side house we stayed in had a futon and they had little padded beds for Jasmine and I. He also informed us that there was some wine in the fridge if we wanted any. HA HA HA HA HA. This was unreal. Jenny showed up and she was equally charming and welcoming. We explained the documentary and told them we had to interview them. We never thought we would get anyone near their age and not only that, but ones that were as intelligent and experienced as they were. Charles was a retired Anthropology professor and Jenny was still teaching. I wanted to get the equipment set up as fast as possible to not miss any of the conversation. We sat outside under the trees and sat and drank some freshly brewed stout ass beer. Great stuff. It was way too surreal. The talk that took place was very broad and ranged anywhere from politics, to religion, to myspace. They hadn’t heard of myspace, so we had a lot to explain. We talked for hours and even though I was very tired I didn’t want it to end. It was so nice to talk to people that were highly educated and had so much to teach us. I can tell that their students were lucky people. It was cool because they had random things laying around their living room and I remembering focusing on a Norman Rockwell art book. I liked that. Once again this trip has taken us on so many different twists and turns. We keep meeting people we never expected to and I hope that it keeps going up. What is this, day 8? This whole trip is crazy. How can I go back to work after 20 more days of this?! The sleep was great and but we had to get up early to make to the 4 Corners and then the Grand Canyon in one day. It sucked to say goodbye to Charles and Jenny and I hope to hear again from them. We were their first couchsurfers and I hope we did a good job. After saying goodbye we stopped to eat. I of coarse got a breakfast burrito with green chile and got to drink some milk for the first time since I left. It was great. So right now we are traveling towards the corner of Utah, Colorado, New Mexico, and Arizona. Then off to find a hotel/motel before we get up at the butt-a** crack of dawn to head off on our hike towards wherever the hell we’re going to camp in the Grand Canyon.

-Jonny

Mexicans, Indians, and Chuck Norris.

So we slept very well at the motel. I had a dream that America was going through another civil war and I was helping with negotiations. Dick Cheney was being a complete a**hole and was not willing to compromise about anything. Something tells me that's how it would be in real life. We ate the continental breakfast (2 packs of maple/brown sugar cinammon oatmeal and one waffle, plain. I don't know what the deal with western states is, but I can only find Vitamin D milk. Aaargh. I haven't had milk in days and that is not a normal thing.) and Melis stole 2 packs of oatmeal from the place. What a rebel. Packed up and drove past the White Sands again which was sad, because we wanted to go again. For a couple of days Melissa had been trying to reach our person in Albequerque, who her and Jasmine knew from high school. He was not answering our phone calls and finally called us back while we were stopped in Truth or Consequence, New Mexico. More on that later. He tells us some lame a** reason why we couldn't stay with him. "My girlfriend doesn't want you all to stay with me." "My apartment is really small." "I don't know Jon and he might steal my stuff." Like I said, Lame A**. Great how he decided to bring this up the day we were supposed to stay with him. Arg, is all I can say. Whatever, we stayed in Truth or Concequences (TRC) and the town rocks. Apparently the town renamed itself after the gameshow back in the 60s. You can imagine the people that live here. Seems to be a bunch of hippies and artists. There is also an abundance of natural hot spings, because the water is very close to the surface. We are staying in a motel that only cost $41 for a two bed and kitchen room. That also includes getting to use the hot springs bathhouses. After unpacking we were informed of a local lake nearby that has a beach called, Elephant Butte. It's apparently pronound Buoot. We still call it Elephant Butt. After getting there it started to storm immediatly and sand and rain was blowing around very hard. We started to leave but I noticed that a family had been camping and were starting to lose their tent and everything laying around it. The girls ran to the car because the sand was really starting to hurt. The wind was extremely fierce. I was able to help the mom hold on to the tent while the two kids were freaking out. The mom and I were holding on with all of our strength and it was still starting to take off. I started grabbing as many rocks as I saw and placing them on the tent to help hold it down. It was just like a big parachute catching the wind. The wind finally subsided and we were able to firmly plant the tent down. It sucked because so much of their stuff had been ruined. I kept hearing the kids ask where they were going to sleep. I don't think they were very well off. I kept asking if there was anything else I could do, but the mom kept insisting I had done enough. I think they ended up sleeping in their truck. That sucked. So we left not even getting to go in the water. We came back and relaxed in the natural hot springs and it was great. We ended up getting to know the Motel attendant and we told her our situation with the movie and with our dude ditching on us. She became very friendly and was determined to help us out. We are going to meet with her in the morning at a local coffee shop and hopefully get to interview some of her friends. She has also possibly found us a place to stay tomorrow night since we were supposed to stay two nights in Albequerque. After chilling out for a while we then went out on the natural hot spring jacuzzi that's on top of the roof. It was private, cool, and had a cool view of the sky. What looked like it was going to be a crappy day turned out to not be that bad after all.

-Jonny

Big, pink, and on the left.

So we ended up shooting some more great footage of Luke infiltrating the Christian version of myspace. Great stuff. The day was pretty lazy other than that. We did go to a great truck stop to find such items as wallet size nudy pics, upside down Dali paintings, homemade VHS tapes with stuff taped off of HBO, and the entire series of Bum Fights. Quite the spectacle. Ventured to Cracker Barrel because Melis was hoping to find a T-shirt with "Don't Mess with Texas" on it. No luck, but Luke did have us rolling while playing with one of those talking parrots. We all then went to get some food at a place called "Cool Beans." Not too bad, but there was a cereal bar down the block that I would have much rather gone to. Mmmmm, cereal. And next to it was a comic book store. Mmmmm, comics. We were all having trouble deciding on what we were going to do for the 4th. I have never been one for fireworks, so I didn't really care. After much deliberation and lounging we headed out for a party on top of a liquor barn. It was cool and easy going, but then I got the itch. We were sitting there and I just realized we were wasting our time. We should be moving. As tiresome as it is, we have a very short amount of time to kick this country's a**. Luke and the gang in Denton was profound on our Doc, and we really wish we could have just taken him with us. Once again, the shoes will be hard to fill for the next people we meet. So we promptly left the party and said our goodbyes to Luke. Heading out to New Mexico at 12:00am spontaneously was a great feeling. We all knew that it was the right thing to do the second we hit the road. Melis did a big amount of driving and I took over at around 5 and finished off the other half of the trip. Driving at dawn through there was awesome. Jasmine got some great photos. Watching the environment morph, not only through the sunlight, but also through the actual landscape, was enough to make me want to sell my stuff, quit my job, and change the same way the scenery had. New Mexico is called the land of enchantment and they ain't f***ing around. We witnessed mountains, dunes, deserts, gulches, cracks, mist, plants stabbing up into the air, cacti, giant birds, clouds, stars, clouds, huge machines moving and digging without anyone in sight, clouds, and then to top it off we made it to Alamogordo, home of the White Sands. It's hard to write much about it because it's not easily capured in words other than ones like, it's white, and it's sand. Check out the pictures, because they only begin to show you the blaring sands. Hot and sweaty, we spent our first 30 minutes there losing our mind with an explosion of senses. It was well into the 90s and the sands have a way of reflecting the sun back up, making it even hotter. The sands also reflect the light making it incredibly hard to even look out without sunglasses. Naturally the ladies were prepared for this, and well me being the man, braved the blistering sun and became lost in the light. We got some good dead hot footage and quickly retreated back to the car. We were going to have to come back when it was cooler. Since we had the luxary of staying at a motel this time(thanks NKU), we thought it would be smart to take advantage of the pool. The clouds came back and stole our sun, but we ended up sleeping out by the shaded pool, seeing how none of us had any real sleep since the day before. Later we went to a great Mexican restraunt called Tacos and Salsas, were as I'm sure you can guess, they had tacos and salsas. In fact, they had a salsa bar. It was great. I ate my green chile burrito with some grean chile salsa, which was very much like a spicy saw mill gravy. Great s***. Would have loved to have bought some for my friends, but I'm sure it would have never kept througout the trip. Headed back out to the Sands later and got some great a** footage. I would really like to do this a lot more. As in, forever. Errrm. The air was cool and perfect. We watched the sun set over the hills causing the sands to turn from white to blue. Got some footage of a lizard. Melis caught it and picked it up, but then freaked out because she thought it could poison her through it's skin. Left. Ate custard. Came home. Got some much earned sleep.

-Jonny

Fun in Denton

Here's a sample of the video we shot in Denton. Enjoy!

He-Man Lunchboxes are never reliable support systems.

Showers are good. Well, as I'm writing, Jasmine is taking the last of the showers. The name road dogs has taken on many different meanings. We certainly smell like road dogs. Luke came up with some great road dog rendetions: An Oscar Meyer Wiener mobile and dog road kill. Well, yesterday was a definite work day. We started off shooting footage at a Vintage clothing store, just some general shots of the girls talking and Luke trying on ladies gloves. Then headed back to his place to interview him about all of his extensive myspace personas. He has dozens of different pages that are all his creations. Very awesome stuff. We got great footage. Certainly a nitche we never even envisioned. Once from there Will and Luke had promised us a song about myspace. The school that's around here is a well known music school. So Will knows his s***. Luke found us a great place to shoot the recording. The house was owned by some of his friends Camilla and Sara and Krystal. The house had great furniture and I loved to see a Herman/Miller shell chair in the living room. They were music people and instead of just a Luke and Will production it turned out to be a newly fused band of them and Jasmine, Melis, Krystal, Camilla, and Nick. It was great shit. Very surreal. Very stressful, but hopefully worth it. Our audio equipment is not suitable for that type of event, but I'm sure it will just add to the guerrilla S*** WE BE DOIN'! Finally met the elusive Zoe, who was very cool and friendly. Everyone was great there and we are growing fond of this Denton, TX. I know that we have made a great new friend through Luke and I certainly hope to see him again after the trip. We had more than 20 release forms signed yesterday, to give you an idea of the chaos. Today should be an easier day and we hope to just get krunk.

-Jonny

Kittens and Urine Cups

Uhhhh. We got to Little Rock and met up with our first "unknown" named Mandy. Very nice and eager to please. She had a really welcoming house that was a nice beginning to the "unknowns." After doing a little shooting with the DVX(yea!) we headed off to Mandy's place of work, Pizza D'Action. It was a cool little bar/pizza joint that was apparently the place to hang. I took the DVX with me but was having a hard time getting good shots because it was dark as hell. Met some really nice and cool people. Drank my favorite, Red Stripe. Getting the release form from the owner was funny because he was drunk as hell and his friend who was equally drunk was telling him to not sign it tonight and wait until tomorrow. The owner disregarded his friend's logical suggestion, signed the sheet, and told me to "Go get 'em." We crashed at Mandy's place and fell the f*** asleep. We were unable get the wireless to work at her place so we couldn't update until today. It's amazing how much it puts us behind to miss one day of ye ole intranet. I know that all of our minds are maxed out right now. Everyday we are meeting completely new people, in completely new places. Information overload is a better way to put it. At a Little Rock gift shop we found postcards with a picture of Bill Clinton's "boyhood home." Very crappy and very dilapidated. The funny part is he only lived there for three years and then moved somewhere else. It had the address on the back. While driving to Dallas, we saw a sign for Bill Clinton's birthplace. We took the exit without question and soon found out we were searching for the house that was on the postcard. Using the directions as a guide we found it, and well, it was just as boring as the postcard. But dam**t, we were there and took some pictures. Um, and it certainly not his birthplace. Never trust anyone from Hope, AR is what I've always said. Made it to Texas. And it's true what they say, everything is bigger. And by bigger, I mean fatter. We saw the most ridiculous amount of restaurants. EVER. We passed a billboard stating "The Best Soup in Town" at a place called "Mary's at Puddin' on the Hill." Could you turn that down? Don't lie, a**hole. So we took the exit and found that there was no directions once off of the exit to find the place. We drove and drove, but to no avail. Heading back out we said "f*** you, mary" and regretted not finding it to this very second.
Zoe was the gentlemen we were supposed to meet from Dallas. He was slightly confusing and things ended up getting mixed up. Long story later we drove around all over the greater Dallas area and met Zoe's friend Luke at a place in Denton. It turns out to be a huge college town and was very cool. Luke is certainly a character but reminds me of my friend Tony, back in his wilder days and I feel at ease around him. We drank at a bar called TJ's(Texas Jive) which had the most god awful music, but the alcohol was cheap. Drank some local beer called Shiner. Not too bad, but still no Red Stripe. Retired to a place called "the White House." The pics of the spraypainted walls should give you a good idea of the feeling. We were going to record some songs with Luke and his posse, who apparently make music on a regular basis, but we were waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too tired to haul all of the equipment out and start the process. Since it was already 2am we decided to postpone it until the next day. We drove Luke and his friend Will (Jasmine on my lap and Luke on Will's) to Luke's place which has some great cats and great atmosphere. We set up camp and started the never ending process of charging everything. Sleep was good. Very good. Woke up and scrabbled to start our internet processes and pack up the s***. Pop-Tarts are good. Soon to be heading off to do who knows what.

-Jonny

Wippity Wipes

So, we had a blast last night. After seeing some more of the city via Dan, we hung out with some of Laurel's friends on "The Stoop." Most of them seemed nice and were willing to sign our release forms. Of course there was the one a**-hat who thought he'd be a douche and not sign. I knew it was bound to happen. Sometimes 2-Kool-4-Skool-Fata**es don't like to let people have fun when they have the chance to prevent it. Blah blah blah. His loss. I just shot around him. We went to some bar called, [ENTER TRENDY BAR NAME HERE]. Sure there were plenty of hipsters, but that’s nothing new considering the bars we go to in Cinci. Pretty much got wasted on some locally brewed beer called Yazoo. Not bad, tasted like Blue Moon. It was draft only so I had to move to Hienichalkaksalkjan. Tasted like skunk, but got the job done. We (Jaz, Melis, Laurel, Matt[Laurel's boyfriend, who by the way was really cool and I could tell that we would get along great and we had the same laptop], etc.) danced like we were a bunch of drugged-out ravers. It's nice dancing around people you will never see again. Makes you a little more daring in your moves. Got a ride home with some guy(Blake?) that used the word "thoroughfare" and had a convertable, Kudos. For our first stay I really hope that it just goes up from here. It will be pretty hard because Laurel was super cool and the other hosts have some big shoes to fill. If you're reading this Laurel and party, thanks a lot and we hope to see you again.

Got to Graceland and well it's pretty much what you would expect. A huge tourist trap that tries to get squeeze every penny out of you. $22.00 for a ticket to the basic tour. Saw all kinds of really awesome furniture and clothes. I never really felt one way or the other about Elvis, but I'm pretty sure I don't like him. Most of his music was really terrible. I do like his really early stuff. The Graceland Crew took our picture in front of some lame Graceland mural and tried to make us pay $20 to buy it. We grabbed the photo and tried to take a picture with our digital camera, both pics came out fuzzy. They didn't like our tactic. OH YEAH! I TOOK A HUGE CRAP AT GRACELAND! I could have done it in Nashville, but I knew this was just asking to be dropped off somewhere really special. That was worth the $22 alone. Something to tell the grandchildren. I also ordered the famous peanut-butter and banana sandwich. I think our pictures of the event will express our opinions of the taste. Stopped in downtown Memphis. Nice enough. Passed the Memphis Pyramid. What the hell is with Tennessee having these ancient marvel knockoffs? Currently heading to Little Rock to meet Mandy, who is our first official person from the internet. Today is mine and Jasmine's 6 month anniversary. I couldn't have had a better day with her.

Shoo.

-Jonny